Really good points! I've recently made a post similar to this (shameless plug at the end), I have extensive experience with PHP from my past, but the only reason I still use it for personal projects is that I know it' quirks not because it's more effective than other languages!
Liked when you said "PHP is the present. Not the future."
Hopefully more stable languages will take over and global web hosts will support them out of the box in the near future